Eds Last Resort Rally 2011 Ride Report

I finally have my own motorcycle to ride in a rally!!!  I put about 1500 miles on the 98 Concours since I bought it, and other than a few tiny oil leaks I took care of, there have not been any issues with it mechanically. Thats good considering its got 73000 miles on it.  Some rally guys have up to $30,000 tied up in motorcycles, electronics, riding suits, and other "farkles".  I have a staggering $2500 invested!  I'm doing the "Bubba" version of rallying...  Duck tape it if it breaks and hope you make it until the end.  But I bought 100mph tape just in case!   My farkling consists of a taller windshield, cup holder, and GPS mount.   I installed a 12v lighter plug outlet in the dash so I could plug in a GPS or phone, or both.  I used a RAM mount and cradle on the clutch reservoir for the Garmin (car type) GPS.  It test rode a few times and I got it positioned where I wanted it.  Worked great.  Hard to hear over the noise, but no big deal.  The motorcycle versions of GPS are water proof and pair up with bluetooth helmet systems to listen to it.  They are also $700 and up!  Not gonna happen.  So I packed a ziplock bag and duck tape to cover the GPS in case it rained since it was $99 3 years ago, and not waterproof.  And if for some reason, the RAM cradle or mount broke, I also packed the suction cup from the car for it.  Just in case....  I packed all the hand tools I thought I would need for a minor roadside repair, tire slime and plug kit, small air compressor, cloth to clean the windshield, rain suit, change of clothes, and a shaving kit. All that had to fit in the saddle bags, so my top bag was free for rally paperwork, laptop, and other essentials needed during the rally.  I used the tank bag for medicine, 5hour energy drinks, granola bars, cash, phone... anything I may need immediately while riding but not worth stopping for.  I packed it all up the Thurs before the rally, so all I had to do Fri morning was pack my computer bag, suit up, and head out.
Fri came, kissed the fam goodbye and suited up.  I figured I would show up early and help out Ed with anything he needed.  This was also going to be THE long distance shake down run, since the longest ride yet was only about 1 hour on the road.  I figured if the bike could make the 3 hour ride there w no issues, it would make the 12 hr rally.  I was also using the ride there as a practice rally.  No stopping for any reason other than gas.  This was to make sure the RIDER was ready for the 12 hour rally.   Got my gas in Crawfordville, reset the GPS trip meter, and hit the road.  There are no highways to get to Surrency, GA... all back roads through tiny towns.  This is a good test for GPS functionality and accuracy as most rally locations are "off the beaten path".  See the trend here... A lot of things to test on this ride to the rally.  Its almost like I'm winging it!  Which is pretty much the case. 

I made it 200 or so miles, 10 miles from Ed's and stopped in Baxley for water, lunch, and gas... in that order.  It was pushing 100 degrees and my 24oz bottle of water was long gone!  I grabbed 2 bottles of water, a corn dog, and sat down on at a gas station table for lunch.  Drank one full bottle of water, ate the corn dog, and was out the door in 5 mins.  Headed to the pumps, filled the tank to the max since this was my starting fuel for the rally, and drove it in to the the Resort.  I made it and the bike made it with no issues.   Again... this had been a test of the GPS.  From the time I left the house, until I got there, time was falling off the arrival time on the GPS.  Add in the food and gas stop, I arrived at the end at the exact minute the GPS said I would all the way back at the house.  Good info to have.  Basically, for every 3 hours on the road, I gain enough time to fill up w gas, food, and water... and break even on time.  Gain time on the road to loose it at the gas stops.  When my route says 12 hours on the computer, it does not factor in stopping for any reason.  It just gives you on the road time.  But since my driving style lets me break even on the GPS arrival times, this means I won't have to factor in the stops for the rally.  Less of a headache.  Score!  GPS worked like a champ the whole ride over on its new handle bar mount. 

There are only a handful of people there since I'm pretty early.  Ed greets me and wants to check out the ride.  He tells me he used to have one just like it and was thinking about getting another one.  (I'm sure he was just blowin smoke since his mount is much nicer than mine) Dad pulls in a couple minutes later with Ernie and now all the story telling and lying officially begins.  Dinner isn't until 6 so we have a few hours to burn.  We help Ed move stuff around, and get things ready for the rest of the crowd.  People keep trickling in.  Again... on bikes.  In cars.  Trucks pulling trailers.  Campers pulling cars.  Bikes pulling trailers.  Most everyone is there by 6 for dinner, as the rally packs are getting handed out @ 7:30.  That's really what everyone wants the night before the rally.  The partying is really for when the rally is over.  Tonight its all about planning the route.  As it is for all of Ed's rallies, its a 'soup' dinner on Fri evening.  Ed's special stew and rice.  If you ask whats in it, you possibly run the risk of hurting Ed's feelings.  You don't want to hurt Ed's feelings!  But I helped him take the pigs feet from the freezer to the pot, so I have a good idea whats in there. It was pretty good considering it was my first time eating pigs feet. 

This is also when I learned the boat paddle stirring the stew was hand made from the reclaimed wood of an old outhouse.  Luckily this wasn't the first time it had been used.  But in true southern fashion, and Ed's, things took a litter longer than expected.  And dinner ran a little late.  No big deal right?  As stated before,  people show up Fri night to get the rally packs.  Around 8pm people were getting antsy for their packs, since they were supposed to be handed out at 7:30.  Ed and the Rally Masters, Jim and Donna Phillips, combined the dinner and riders meeting to calm them down.  It does take a while just to input the 70 or so locations into a computer, or on a map, so any time wasted cuts into planning and sleep time.  So once the packs were handed out, and bellies full... everyone scattered to start route planning.

Thankfully dad and I sat down together with our computers and started formulating plans.  This was of course only my second rally.  And a few weeks prior, he got trained on the way to plan a route on a computer.  A bit after that, we talked on the phone on how to do it, so now we are both ready to put our new computer aided route planning skills to the test.  DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG IT TAKES TO TYPE IN 70 LOCATION'S GPS COORDINATES INTO A COMPUTER WITHOUT MESSING UP!!!!  WTF!  Next year I'm lobbying to get them in digital format, since that is how they got the info in this years Iron Butt Rally...  The biggest rally in the US.   I took me almost 2 hours just to get the data in the computer right.  But I finally got a birds eye view of all the locations and started plotting a route.  But what I was finding, was that all the close in bonus locations weren't worth shit for points.  Its a common thought that there is a winning route that most people quickly see, and plan around that route.  Not this year.  Jim and Donna put a lot of work into spreading the field.  You had to go for a long ride to get points.  Generally, you can pick up a lot of little point bonuses, or go for a few big point bonuses to win.  Not this year.  If you want a lot of points, you have to go a long way get them.  The previous 2 years, the winners racked up around 7000 points.  Most of my routes were coming in around 2000-2500 points.  Dad was having a tough time too.  There were just no routes to go to pick up a lot of big points, or a few big points with a bunch of little points on the way.  There was a cluster way down in central FL, but dad said that was the "sucker route".  An obvious route thrown in by the Rally Masters to see if a sucker would take the bait and DNF (Did Not Finish).  They look doable, but they aren't.  So I kept trying all the routes I could, and throwing in all the wild card bonuses... still not enough points.  So just for the hell of it... I plotted a route to the FL locations.  It was over 3000 points before the wildcards.  It was also 12 hours drive time... not including stops to get the bonuses, or gas.  Dad was still convinced it was a sucker route...  So still being in the Rookie class this year, I took the sucker route.  I figured if I make it, I have a good shot at placing in the top 5.  If not, oh well.  But in my head it was the only route that had enough points to possibly win.  It was now about midnight, so I was beat.  I plugged the coordinates to all the bonuses into the GPS by hand and went to bed.  Dad was still up grinding away on his route.
I tossed and turned about an hour, so I got about 4 hours sleep before it was time to get up.  It was nice to stay in the cabin at Eds since it was right there.  But after sharing a room with 3 other old, crusty, snoring men.... the Holiday Inn may have been a better choice :)   I put my contacts in, brushed my teeth, and headed out for the doughnut breakfast.  I had 2 or 3, a cup of OJ, a small cup of coffee, and a 5 hour energy drink.  I dried all the dew off the windshield so I could see, mouted up the GPS and verified all the coords were still in there, and STARTED THE BIKE.  It started fine.  You do learn something in every rally.  I was not going to be jump starting my bike after everyone left this year.  Plus I had a 700 mile course in front of me, so I was going to try and be one of the first out.  I told dad my route, he tried to explain his which was HEAVY on piecing together all the wild card bonuses.  I warmed up the bike around 6:10 since its carbureted and doesn't like to run smooth until its got some heat in the motor.  Shut it off after about 5 mins.  I got suited up, and was sitting on the bike ready to go at 6:20.  I was the only idiot doing that.  Rookies.  Oh well.  I was ready.  I had the first bonus in the GPS and ready to go.  People started wandering to their bikes.  At 6:25 the Rally Master said "We have a lot of bike to get out of here, so you can start moving out."  I wasn't waiting for a second opinion.  I cranked it up and was gone!  I was 2nd out of the gate.  I can use those extra 5 mins!

I purposefully chose my first bonus 10 miles away, first instead of last, just to get one out of the way quick and settle the nerves.  The rider that got out in front of me apparently had the same idea.  I followed him a mile or 2, doing the speed limit.  When I saw I lost a minute on the GPS, I flew around him and took off.  I had a LOT of ground to cover, and could not loose time on the GPS.  I found the first location, grabbed the notebook from my tank bag, wrote down the info requested, and was off.  Never got off the bike.  I pulled up the next location on the GPS, did a U turn and was gone.  The guy I passed pulled up as I was leaving.  I saw him getting off the bike to get his rally sheet out to fill in the info.  What a waste of time I thought!  I took a left at the stop sign and took off.  The sexy British voice on the GPS said "Recalculating.  When possible, make a U-turn."  Lesson one learned already.  Look at the GPS when leaving a location!!  I'm sure the other guy was saying to himself... "What a waste of time," as I drove past him going the other way now :)  My next stop was just past the GA/FL line 85 miles away.  On my way there, since it pretty early, and I'm in the middle of nowhere, and noone is on the road... I pick up the pace.  Maybe slightly above the posted speed limit.  Well... the faster I go, the more the bike vibrates.  Thats normal.  The handle bars is where most of the vibration is felt.  The GPS is mounted to the handlebars.  It starts tuning off, and back on randomly.  WTF!  I cant ride a 12 hour rally w/o a GPS.  Especially my route.  The plug is in the socket tight.  I lay my hand on the GPS. Its shaking like a Harley on the handle bars.  I slow down a bit... that lessens the reboots.  Speed up... reboots more.  I figure I will deal with it until the next stop.  About 20 mins from the next bonus it starts sprinkling.  Now I have to stop to cover the GPS with the ziplock, or the rain will kill it.  I figured my only other option in mounting was the windshield suction cup mount I brought on a whim.  I stuck it on there, ziplocked it, and duct tapped it shut to keep the water out.  Off I went.  Got it up to speed... no vibrations.  It didn't turn off again...  SCORE.  5 mins wasted on the side of the road though.  I'm just hoping it doesn't loose suction and fall off.  On to the bonus.

Most the bonuses have a paragraph description, since they are usually historical in some way.  This one was called "Off the Beaten Path".  To me this meant, most likely, a dirt road.  No problem.  Ed's Last Resort is on a dirt road.  When I turned down the first road, it showed 6 miles to destination.  It was paved.  Cool.  A mile later, it turned to dirt.  Crap.  I slowed down, since it was hard packed and rippled really bad. It was shaking me to death.  I'm idling for about another mile, then w/o warning, that hard packed dirt tuned to sand.  The front wheel dug in,  tuned right full tilt,  and came to a complete stop.  Immediately!  We went down.   Holy F'n Sheeiit!!!  Lesson two.  Don't drive on loose sand roads!  I immediately jump up, put he kick stand down, and throw the bike back up on two wheels.  All 600 lbs of it!  Mirror is bent back, air scoop on the fairing is busted off on one end, but nothing too bad.  I shoved the vent, back into its hole.  Sheeit!   Cranks right up.  Good.  Nothing but sand the next 5 miles... no f'n way.  I'm just going to turn around and head back to the main road, and skip this one...... 5 mins later, I finally got it turned around and headed out. Sand pits are not easy on a 600 lb street bike and street tires.  Now I'm really behind, and no points.  What else can go wrong!  I'm barely into this and already have GPS issues, dropped the bike, and missed a bonus. One more thing goes wrong, and I'm done.

I get back on the pavement, and head south.  I'm one mile into FL, and my next stop is 150 miles south in New Smyrna Beach.  Bike is feeling Ok after the fall, and the GPS still hasn't shut off.  Looking better.  But I have a lot of time to make up, and I can't miss any more bonuses or my route IS the sucker route.   I was on the west side of Jax so I got on I-295 and continued south around Jax.  295 is normally 80 - 85mph, bumper to bumper traffic so I should be able to keep the pace up pretty high.  UNLESS you fall in behind an FHP car.  Speed limit it is... for about 10 miles.  Finally he pulled off and traffic picked back up.  Traffic was pretty thick all the way to Daytona, but I was able to keep the Connie in the 80s most the way.  I was making OK time.  Still gaining time so thats good.  I guess.  But my GPS, being the cheap-o one, does not let me set an entire route.  So I only know how long to the next stop... not total time.  I had 5 stops to make in FL, make the turn, and head back to the house.  I've included 2 'throw away' bonuses back in GA, that if I was short on time I could skip.  I just won't know how good I'm doing on time, until after the last FL stop.  Plus at some point I have to take a mandatory 30 min break at a McDonalds.  I decided to get all my FL bonuses before my break, that way I had 30 mins to calculate how much time I still have and if I need to head to the house or go after the last 2 bonuses.  So I'm pretty much winging it... Bubba style.

I make to the New Smyrna Beach Harley store, and get my business card as indicated on the rally sheet.  I have a flip face helmet, so I just walked in, in full gear, grabbed a card from the sales guy and left... 3 mins.  My GPS took me west to I-4, to get to Mt Dora.  The next stop was the Mt Dora Lighthouse.  I had to find the sign that stated the wattage of the bulb used in the light house.  Yeah.... 20 mins looking for the sign, I gave up.  It looked like everything at the park was brand new.  I guess that sign was removed during renovation.  I snapped a photo with my cell phone, and headed to get a gas receipt that showed I was in Mt. Dora.  I hope thats enough for the Rally Bastard.  15 mins wasted, and a few more minutes getting gas.  But I have a full tank which should last me the rest of the FL bonuses.  Now its time to start looking for BBQ restaurants.  One of the wild card bonuses, was (I thought) to get 3 menus from 3 different BBQ restaurants.  Off to Gator Joes Restaurant in Oklawaha, FL!

I ate a granola bar out of my tank bag while stopped at the red lights leaving Mt Dora.  45 miles of back woods towns and back roads through mobile home retirement villages to the next stop. I found a BBQ catering truck on the side of the road and asked for a menu.  But I had to explain to the frail lil ole lady what I was doing, and will not be ordering food.  She had to be 85yrs old.  I asked if she knew of any more BBQ places nearby so I could get menus from them.  She said "If you want to cheat, I have a binder full of them. How many you need?" I respectfully declined and headed on.   Thats not the spirit of the rally.  Besides, I should pass 100 places by the end of the rally right... I'm in the south.  BBQ joints are like Starbucks... one on every corner down here.  Unless you are looking for them!!  I didn't pass another one before the next bonus.  I finally get to the coordinates for Gator Joes, and all thats there is a house, and a gated road.  WTF.  I get off the bike, and pull out the rally pack to check what I typed in at 12 am was right.  It looked close, but not the same.  So I typed it again, and hit GO on the GPS.  She immediately told me to turn right.  So I load everything back in the trunk, crank it up and turn right.  "Arriving at destination on right".  Oh yeah... lesson one was look a the GPS before leaving the location.  I didn't see, the 'new' coords were only 100 ft away.  Too bad I had to drive a mile to find a place to turn around.  WTF!!!   Get off the bike again, pull out the rally pack again, and read the description again!  The coords are in the GPS right.  WTF!!!!  But this listing had an actual street address, unlike most of the rest of them.  I type in the street address and hit GO.  6 miles further down the road, on the OTHER side of the lake it shows the destination.  Bad Rally Master!!  Giving us the wrong coordinates.  Time lost 10 mins!  The GPS finally takes me strait to Gator Joes, and I get my info.  5 mins onsite to park and go hunt the sign I needed to find... still in full gear of course.  Next stop, The Florida National Cemetary in Bushnell, FL.

Still on back roads, I'm driving as fast as reasonably safe... passing when I can.  But still making OK time.  I think.  I still have no idea if all the set backs were were too much to overcome on the road.  I only had a 15 min window in the good according to the computer... but thats been eaten up twice over.  I find the cemetery easily, but the plaque I needed for info was on the back side of the tourist building.  Off the bike again.  I get the info and punch in the listing for the Train Museum in Dade City, FL.  Now where is another BBQ place.

Still all back roads, its 30 or so miles to the Train Museum... I passed another road side trailer selling BBQ.  Swing in there real quick, and the guy was not too pleasant.  No menu.  So off I go again.  3 mins wasted.  I found another one... this time a real building.  Ran inside and asked for a menu.  "Sorry.  We area all out."  WTF!  "Oh wait, here's a breakfast menu.  But there is no BBQ for breakfast."  As long as it has the word Barbeque on it I'm good... and It does.  Out I go w my menu.  Oh wait!!  This one does say BARBEQUE, but the other says BBQ.  I better check the rally pacl to see if either is OK.  Well... the letter of the law says it needed the WORD "barbeque"on the menu.  But it didn't say BBQ was not accepted.   These things matter.  But I also read that I only needed ONE barbeque menu.  I mixed up in my head the requirements from another wildcard bonus that needed 3 different items.  Shit!  All that time wasted!  Oh well... Keep moving.  I have what I need.  Plus a backup.

I was looking for a locomotive, or caboose, or something visual on the side of the road for the train museum... nope.  Just a little old train depot building with a plaque on the wall.  I had to park on one side of the building and run to the other to find the plaque.  Got my info, and re-read the rest bonus requirements so I don't screw that up too.  All I need is a starting receipt, and an ending receipt from a McDonalds.  But another bonus was a Vidalia onion, or a sauces made w Vidalia onions.  I figured since I was headed to I-75, I could find an exit with a McDs and a roadside FL fruit stand/tourist trap.  Don't they always have Vidalia onions... and pecan logs... and Moon Pies!?!  I'm now done with the FL bonuses, and headed back to GA.

I see a sign on the hwy for one of the tourist traps at the same exit as a McDonalds.  Score.  I pull off and head for the McDs.  I go in and order a full meal since this is the first stop for food and drink today.  The receipt says 2:00 pm on the nose.  The 30 min clock is ticking for the rest bonus.  I eat my nuggets and fries, down 32 oz of Powerade, and call the wife to say I'm still alive and kickin.  I walk across the parking lot to the fruit stand to see if they have Vidalia onions or sauce.  They did!  Awesome.  I told her I'd be back in a bit.  I could have bought it then, but again... thats not in the spirit of the rally.  You are not allowed to complete any other bonuses during the rest bonus.  So I went back to the bike, and brought up the time/distance to get back to the finish.  I had to be back by 7pm, and GPS said I was a bit less than 4 hrs out.  So I had about a 1:15 cushion after my break to get back.  That was plenty of time to pick up the last two bonuses in GA and get back.  So I pulled up Valdosta, GA and had it set for the next leg.  I look at the clock on the bike and it was 2:30, so I went back in and ordered a small fry (the cheapest thing on the menu) and got my end receipt for the rest bonus.  It said 2:29.... close enough to to 30 mins.  I rode the bike around the parking lot to get my Vidalia onion.... which they only sold on 5lb bags.  So I bought a little bottle of Vidailia Onion sauce FOR $15!!! SHould have bought the 5lb bag and just taken one onion for $5.  Oh well.  To the other side of the parking lot for gas.  Fueled up, and headed out.  2.5 hrs to Valdosta.

Somewhere between Ocala and Gainesville on 75, the bottom fell out of a cloud.  It looked like it'd be a short afternoon shower, so I didn't bother donning rain gear in order to save the stop time.  30 MILES LATER I drove out of it.  I was soaked!!  But @ 80 something mph, it doesn't take too long to dry out.  But I still don't know how I made it through all of it.  I was sandwiched between two semis, front and back, riding in the center lane, and one in the right lane out front.  It was raining like hell, and all the spray from the trucks gave me a visibility of about 20 feet.  My new wind shield had no rainx on it so the water was coating the front, then rolling over to the back of it... so water on both sides and I couldn't see through.  I had to sit up as straight as possible to see over the top of it.  Luckily the wind kept the visor clear of water.  And all this was @ 80 mph.  I couldn't see cars coming up in the left lane to move over, plus, they were passing us.... so they were doing about 85.  I just rode until the rain slowed enough so I could see to get out of my sandwich.  Finally the rain stopped, and the sun came out, so now it was time to stick my arms and legs out to dry off.  Once I finally got dried out, another storm was approaching.  This one looked bad!  A low ceiling of black clouds as far as I could see.  It looked like an upside down boiling mud soup.  This time I pulled over and threw on my rain gear over my jeans and jacket.  Took about 5 mins, and I was off again into the mouth of the storm.  Lightning was streaking all around me.  It sounded a few times like it hit right next to me... when you hear it the same time you see the flash.  It was nasty!  But no rain yet.  Just blackness.  Once the the lightning stopped, I finally hit the rain.  It was light, and lasted about 5 mins, and all was clear.  WTF!  Oh well.  This was a cold front moving in, so the temp dropped about 20 degrees.  I should be able to tolerate both jackets. I was not going to stop again to remove the rain gear, unless I had plenty of time in Valdosta at the next bonus. 

All I needed was gas in Valdosta, so just outside the city, I pulled up the finish line to see how much time I had.  I showed me arriving at 7:05pm... 5 mins late!!! Shit.  No time to remove the rain gear now, so it was a gas and go in Valdosta.  When I had figured my time check at the rest bonus, I didn't account for Valdosta being so much farther west than I thought.  Time to pick up the pace.   The next bonus was on the route back, so only a min or two stop there.  I should be able to make up those few mins late on the road.  But I also had to stop for the last wildcard bonus... a cold 6 pack of my favorite beverage.  That'd be another 5 mins or so.  So I had to make up almost 15 mins on the road, and had to cover 110 miles in 1.5 hours, and stop two more times, not to get in late.  Luckily, through most of this, it was mostly long straight back roads, and no traffic.  I was dropping time real good off the GPS now.  Got to the last bonus, got the info w/o out having to get off the bike, and headed to the finish.  I was only going to stop for the beer bonus if the store was on the right side of the road.  So wouldnt you know it... I never passed another store on the right side of the road!!  I finally saw one on the left, one car (no crowd) and pulled in there.  Grabbed the 6 pack of 16oz cans of Bud Lite (I knew I would need a few) , and hit the road.  Now the GPS said my finish time was 6:55.  Still a pretty slim margin, and I had 30 miles to go.  So once the time read 6:50 I felt pretty secure.  Then I see the road blocked in front of me with people walking everywhere, cop cars and firetrucks on both sides of the road, and in the middle lane!! WTF! This is not good!  I think... I just drove 650 miles, in 12 hrs to DNF 20 miles from the end!!  Luckily (for me, not the drivers of the crashed cars) the road was clear on my side, so I made it through the mess with just having to slow down.  I cleared it, and sped back up to speed and took it to the finish.  Again, once I was back around 6:45 arrival time, I locked it to the speed limit and eased it home.  I finished in 12:15 mins (15 mins early) and logged 704 official miles on my odometer... 715 or so on the GPS.  I was worn out.  But happy I finished on time.  I got logged in as completed by the Rally Bastard and they beer checked me for the beer bonus.  I then clarified that I could drink one, BEFORE I got scored since the rally pack said bring the 6 pack to the scoring table.  I was good.  So I downed a 16 oz beer while I gathered all my scoring paperwork.  Then drank another while filling out my paperwork... maybe not the best idea.  There were some riders there, and some still coming in.  Dad was not there yet.  So I sat down and started filling out my scoring sheet.

7pm was the end time. After 7:15, you DNF.  Where's dad?  DNF time came and went.  Ed told me he got a call from dads wife, that he was 200 miles out 2 hours ago.  He showed up around 7:30.  DNF.  But as Richard Buber said... if you never DNF, then you don't try hard enough.  This was his 3rd I think.  So he's always pushing the limit.  I was still doing my paperwork we he came in.  There was a trip log in the back of the rally pack, so thats where I was filling in all my bonuses.  Got it all neat and pretty, then dad said "You know you have to put all that info in the rally pack, not in the log right?"  Crap.  Now I have to go back and transpose the info again!  I get that done... organize all my receipts... and go sit in front of Donna Phillips.  Were going through it all, and get to the Mt Dora Lighthouse.  I show her the photo, and the gas receipt that says Mt Dora, and that there was no sign to be seen talking anything about the light bulb in the light house.  She accepted it.  All the bonus locations points were good.  I didn't loose one... Except for the last one I forgot to write down.  I missed writing it in on the second transposing of the data.  Good thing it was only 30 something points.  Now for the wild cards.  Got the beer bonus.  Got the Vidalia onion.  Got the no speeding ticket bonus.  Time for the gas in 2 states bonus.  The gas bonus in Valdosta was my only gas stop in GA.  I couldn't use one receipt for 2 bonuses.  So I forfeited the regular bounus for the 2 state bonus since it was worth more. 60 points lost there. Now the big blunder...  the rest bonus.  Rally pack stated it was a mandatory 30 min bonus.  My check-in was 2:00, but my check out was 2:29.  Only 29 mins!!!  She said no.  It has to be 30 mins.  I pleaded since the rally pack was wrong about the coordinates for Gator Joes, and that I wasted 10 mins figuring out their mistake, that should more than account for the 1 min short on the rest time.  She asked the other Rally Bastard... Jim Phillips.  He asked me if I knew when I got the receipt that I was 1 min short.  I said yes.  He said nope!  Stop was too short.  There goes 450 points!! So I ended up loosing 500 points at the table, and 100 something by missing the bonus when I dropped the bike.  So I was down 600 - 700 points than what I planned on getting.  Well... I hope more people screw up like me so I have a chance to finish in the top 10 now.  Off I go to tell dad the whole story of the trip and get his reasoning for being so far behind... And EAT!!!

BBQ has become the "Official" food or rallying, and long distance riders.  So dinner was of course BBQ.  And again... all the food at Ed's rallies is homemade.  The only thing store bought was the doughnuts for breakfast.  And of course everything was wonderful.  Everyone is dishing out where they went and the troubles they ran into.  Dad was 25 miles down a road, and came to a bridge out sign.  That put him 25 miles back to reroute, so a 50 mile loss.  Other wise he'd been in on time.  But everyone ran into weather at some point, so we were all even on that regards.  Most the people went North West to the Atlanta area.  Some went to Alabama.  A lot went the west Florida route to Ft Myers and back through Tallahassee.  Me and one other guy did the Sucker route to Central FL.  And he did it in a no-top hot rod.  In the rain.  With no wipers on the 12inch tall windshield.  I think he got more wet than the motorcycle riders.  There was supposed to be a Hot Rod rally too, but with the rain forecast, all but Joe Sunnutti backed out of it.  Instead of winning by default, he decided to compete against the bikes in his open top coupe. We both made it on time.  Now its time to see if the sucker route had enough points to place well.  18 bikes finished and were scored, 5 DNF'd, and 6 more didn't start for various reasons.  10 of the 18 finishers were considered rookies... me included.  So I had an OK chance of placing well.  Once everyone was scored, it was finally time to release to results.  Jim started up the list from 10th place.  10th not me.  9th not me.  8th... to 3rd NOT ME.  So I figured at this point I was out of the top 10.  That sucks.  I really wanted a top 10.  2nd Richard Buber.  This guy has been in a million rallies... I think he lives on a motorcycle.  I'm definitely out.  And first goes too.... ME!! What... I was shocked.  Pleasantly shocked.  And after loosing all those points!!!  Jim confirmed he put all those locations down there as the sucker route, and didn't think anyone would do it.  And if they did, they couldn't make it back in time.  I proved him wrong.  I averaged 57.4 mph over the whole day, rest and all other stops included.  When I wasn't stopped I was moving, and riding hard.  But I knew in my head that route was the highest scoring route, w/o all the wildcards added in.  Richard went for all the combinations of wildcards to get the max points w/o all the mileage.  He still did 625 miles.  But he didn't loose any points at the table.  He shook my hand and said "Congrats on the win.  Winning these things are hard.  I've been trying for 20 years and still haven't won one."  That statement almost made me feel bad.  I felt like I took something from him.  But I earned it... and rode my ass off for it.  And he wasn't mad or upset, and was genuinely excited for me... so I didn't feel bad anymore.  I got my trophy!  One perk that came with the win as a rookie, was a free and guaranteed entry into the 2012 Cape Fear 1000 rally.  This rally fills up in 5 mins once posted online every year.  So in theory I won $90 bucks! Cool.  The rest of the night was more talkin and chattin... People said their goodbyes and headed out.  Some back to the house, most back to their hotels.   Me, Dad, Richard, and Ernie piled into our respective bunk beds in the cabin and got some much needed sleep. 

Sunday morning breakfast was cooked up by Ed in the cabin.   Pancakes, bacon, sausage... and probly some other stuff.  Mr Hod Rod, Joe Sunnutti gave a morning prayer meeting.  He is a Chaplain for God Speed Ministries, and usually travels the drag racing circuits.  After the services, most everything was done.  Me, Dad, and Ernie headed out, and I followed them to Jax.  They went South, I went West and cruised on the house... Ed's Last Resort Rally 2011 Winner.  What to do next?  I have a few ideas.

My 2nd Motorcycle

After Ed's Last Resort Rally 2009, I know I had to get another motorcycle.  But with 2 kids in daycare, the money was just not there to buy and maintain a bike.  I already had to sell the boat, so I knew I was going to have to wait.  Plus, I really didn't have a place to store a bike, since the single car garage was full of fish... The Clown Hatchery is a side business of mine.  I breed and sell 4 different breeds/color variations of Nemo.  Every year I hope to retire off of the little guys, but just about the time things get going really well, something happens and I still have to keep my day job.  But sometimes, jobs come my way in my real profession... computers, that I can earn a lil bit of cash on the side.  I just never seem to get enough lined up to save any.  Summer of 2010, we moved to a bigger house, with a bigger garage, with more room for the fish, and a spot for a motorcycle :) 

Santa brought a pocket rocket for my 4 yr old, and this made daddy really jealous.  Luckily that was mommy's idea.  Our son loves grandpa, and grandpas motorcycle.  So that was his big present for Christmas.  He couldn't ride a bicycle without traing wheels, but he learned to ride the motorcycle in a few minutes.  Finally, Dec 2010/Jan 2011, 4 side jobs were lined up that put enough money in my pocket that I started looking for bikes!!!  I figured with the cash on hand, it would be a 30 -50% down payment on a used bike.  I picked a bike, put a hold on it, called the bank, and.....  a week later I called back, long story short, they laughed!  Now I had to re-plan this bike thing.  I had to find one that cost the same as I had... which wasn't a lot.  My options just dropped way down.  I knew I needed a rally bike, and they are on the upper end of the cost scale.  I knew how much dad paid for his Concours, which is a sport touring bike, so I started looking at them.  OLDER versions of them.  The good thing about touring/sport touring bikes is they generally have large saddle bags and comfortable riding postures so you can ride them long distances.  The bad thing about touring/sport touring bikes that are comfy to ride, is people like to ride them a loooong way, many times!  So finding a rally bike with low mileage is a needle in a haystack.  Most have 50,000-100,000 miles on them after only a few years.  But most long distance riders maintain their bikes pretty good.  So I looked, and looked, and looked.  Too expensive.  Only needs a $100 part to be road worthy.  Only dropped once in the grass ( translated to - flown off a cliff).  No test rides... But I finally found on Craigslist, a 1998 Concours, 5 miles from dads, test ride allowed, ready to ride.  He drove it, liked it, couldn't find anything wrong with it, plus it had a brand new rear tire and Givi top rack/trunk.  But it had 72,000 miles on it.  After reading 1000s of posts on the COG forum, I felt comfortable that the bike should last to 150k with not too many issues.  OR it would blow up on the first ride.  What the hell.  So I deposited the cash in Dads account in Tallahassee, he paid for it and drove it home, and I headed down to pick it up that weekend.  I'm the proud third owner of a 98 Concours!  

 I left work at 11 Fri, picked up the U-Haul bike trailer, and headed South.  I needed to get there early enough to register it at the DMV for tags and title.  There was no way I was going to wait to take it out on the roads.  Plus, if any issues popped up, who better to help fix it, than someone on their second Connie.  I drove straight to the DMV in Daytona, met dad and his wife there with the title, and got it all registered up, titled up, and grabbed a tag.  Luckily dad had an extra helmet, jacket, chaps, gloves... all the stuff I still need to buy!! It was cold, but off we went for a real shakedown. ride. 

This time, it'd only been 2 years since I'd ridden a bike, so no crazy moments.  Drove it straight to Pep Boys for carb cleaner to run through it just in case.  Then some hwy riding, and back road riding.   The hand brake light switch was apparently a bit dirty because the brake light was not coming on except with the foot brake on the start of the ride, but it was working by the end.  I'm good at this mechanic-ing stuff!!  She rode like a dream... a rough buzzy dream... but no issues, no leaks, no problems.  Score!  We took the twins out again the next morning, met up with a crotch rocket friend of mine, and did a little bit more riding before I had to strap it down and head home.  I'm liking this thing.  So far. 

I bought 2 jackets, 2 helmets, rain gear, and some gloves.  After a few more rides, I was getting neck aches, which turned into headaches after about an hour of riding.  This is not good.  I plan on muti-hour and multi-day rallies for this bike.  After searching the COG forums even more, and common sense, I figured out the wind was hitting me straight in the middle of the face shield.   It was causing some horrible buffeting of my head.  I had to do something.  So I ordered a new Cee Bailys wind screen that is about 5 inches taller than stock to direct the air over my helmet, and it has a vent to help with the buffeting.  WOW what a difference!  But I do have to look through the glass unless I sit up as straight as I can, then I can see over it.  Its really not an issue... or so I thought.  More on that in the next blog.  I ended up having to replacing the oil cooler due to a cracked thread causing a small oil leak, and there is still a tiny leak coming from the bevel gear housing seal, which so far is not worth the down time to replace the gasket.  But its on the list of major repairs for a minor annoyance.  Changed the oil in the motor and rear drive just to be safe a few hundred miles later.  I bought some RAM mounts for the GPS, and beverage holder in time for Eds Last Resort Rally 2011.  I've finally got all the essentials for a rally bike.  Time to Rally!

My First Rally

Still not owning a bike, I entered Ed's Last Resort Rally 2009.  I (at the time) still had very little knowledge about rallies, how to plan a route, or most importantly... how they are scored.  But dad is loaning me his Victory, a GPS, and a map.  All I need :)  I took a computer to try the 'pro' way to plan a route, but that was more learning than the amount of time I had.  Luckily, Ed's rally is a return to origin rally... you start and end at the same location.  I borrowed a pop up camper from the mom-in-law, bought some Wally-World motorcycle gloves, a 6-pack of 5 hour energy,  3 diff types of pain relievers for a planned sore ass, and some Starbucks canned coffee.  That should be enough to keep me awake 12 hours on the bike.  Off to my first rally.

I get to Ed's Last Resort... which Ed has turned into a nice little campground with power hook ups, a stocked fishing pond, and IIRC, the house his mother grew up in, or the house he grew up in.  Either way an old country cabin that he had moved to the location.   Its a real quaint set up, right in the middle of hundreds of acres of farm land in Surrency, GA.  There is also a covered carport/barn/outdoor diner where all the festivities take place.  Since its all on location, and not a hotel... and the food is primarily cooked on site.  The entry fee covered dinner on Fri, doughnut breakfast on Sat, BBQ dinner and live music Sat night, and a pancake breakfast on Sun... All hand made right there.  Some people just come for the food and entertainment for the weekend, and don't actually ride in the rally.  They call that in the culture, an RTE.. or Ride To Eat.  This year there were 11 bikes that started, but about 30 people onsite for the event.  I got there a bit early to set up the camper, then waited for everyone else to show up.  I met Ed Tillman for the first time, face to face.  Then I met the special guest this year, who was John Ryan.  Hes the one I mentioned in the last blog, who had just completed his 84 hr, Alaska to Key West trip.  He was well know before that ride, and is now a Legend.  Ed keeps good company! Everyone started showing up on bikes, in campers, trucks pulling bikes, bikes pulling trailers...  There were Harleys, BMWs, Hondas, Kawasakis, Yamahas, and others I couldn't identify. Cruisers, Tourers, Dual Sports, and maybe a rocket in there.  All kinds of bikes, and all kinds of people.  Most were seasoned rally veterans,  since most only heard about the rally at other rallies.  It was only me and one other newbie getting our feet wet for the first time, in our first rally.  I got to meet and talk to a few more people, and everyone was free to offer advice.  My issue was, I didn't know what to ask.... so mostly I just listened to other people talk and soaked up what I could.

Everyone floated around chatting until dinner was served.  Ed used a paddle to stir the stew of ingredients that were sometimes questionable.  It would be my first time eating pigs feet that night.  A lil chewy, but not bad.  It had fallen off the hoof, so you never knew what was in each bite.  REAL southern cooking.  ( I found out in the 2011 rally that the paddle I assumed came from a boat store 50 yrs ago, was actually purpose made for cooking... from a reclaimed board...  from an old outhouse. ) But that is the charm of Ed's rally.  No 4 star hotel banquet hall and dinner at a restaurant.  Ed is a country man, and this is how its done in the country...
After dinner, the long awaited drivers meeting happens.  This is where the Rally Master... also affectionately known as the Rally Bastard... hands out the rally packs.  In your pack is all the bonus locations and wild card bonus info.  They go over a few rules, answer any questions,  and clarify any misunderstandings in the pack.  There is also a white envelope in the pack.  We had to put  our license and insurance card in the envelope,  seal it up,  and the rally bastard initialed the envelope.  One of the wild card bonus is extra points for not getting a speeding ticket.   So if you get back w the envelope intact, the points are yours.  This is to discourage speeding.  When all the questions are finally  answered, everyone scattered like cock roaches!  I knew then these guys were serious... off they went with the packs and computers back to hotel rooms or far corners of the carport to blast the bonus location into the computers, optimize the route, and upload it to their GPS units.  I had a map and post it notes.  My dad helped as best he could, but he was planning his own route.  So me and the other newbie, Ernie, sat together w our maps and plotted the locations as we found the cities.  The locations were all the way up into North Carolina, over into Alabama, and as far south as Key West.  But most were in GA.  We spent a few hours laying out the locations and trying to figure the best routes to get to them, as well as pick up the wild card bonuses.  Around 11pm, I think I finally had a good route picked, so time to MANUALLY type them into the GPS.  Now again, Ed is not technically savvy.  But he had a crap load of 'off the beaten path' places he's been to over the years and gotten their GPS coordinates.  And some he's gotten from other people.  If you know true GPS coordinates... not just entering an address, but the N34.51179 W83.52669 coordinates... then you might know there are 3 ways to write a location.  And Ed had collected all three types of coordinates, and had them mixed in the different bonus locations.  The GPS I had only took one kind.  I tried to get some in there... but it wasn't working.  The other issue was, I was tired and the GPS was hard wired to the bike.  So I was sitting on the bike trying to program it, just getting frustrated.  So after about an hour...  FK it!  I had my map, and I knew where I was going.  I would program the next town I was headed to from each bonus stop, and search the town when I got there.  Off to bed.

I don't sleep well when not at my house.  Especially in a pop up camper where you can hear every noise outside around you.  I may have gotten to sleep around 2 am and back awake at 5.  Dad, Ernie, and I unload the bikes off the trailer, crank em up, and drive em to the starting location.  Now this short, 100 yd drive, was the only warmup ride I got on this beast of a motorcycle.  I'm sure I drug my feet most of the way praying I don't drop it.  But I got it there and shut it off.  This also was my only warmup ride on ANY bike in the last 5 years.  A whole 10 seconds...  And I'm about to take off on a 12 hr ride.  No problem.  I popped an aleeve and tylenol for precationary measures, and drank a 16oz can of coffee.  Over to breakfast we went.  Got to talk a lil bit of strategy, and listened to a lot more.  I already knew I was nowhere near able to win, and all I wanted was to NOT finish last.  Ate a few donuts, drank some juice, downed a 5 hour energy, and waited for the start.  The Rally Bastard walked around and got everyone's starting odometer reading, since you have to track your ride to each bonus and put your odometer reading on the rally scoring sheet at each bonus.  I took my last potty break, and donned my gear.  My plan was to let everyone start ahead of me and be the last to leave...  A) Because I hadn't ridden a bike in 5 years. B) Because the Resort was down a mile long dirt road (did I mention I hadn't been on a bike in 5 yrs) and C) I was not here to win it, so to give everyone else a minute or two head start and not be in their way.  I said my good lucks, and see ya's to dad and Ernie, got on the bike, and waited for the go signal.

The Rally Bastard said go, blew a horn, something... I don't remember, and off everyone went.  As I watched them pull out on the road, I hit the starter button on the Vic.  Nothing.  Not one turnover, or even a click... Nothing.  I turn it off, rock it a bit (maybe the starter is hung), turn it on, hit the button... Nothing.  Awesome.  Now remember... I just cranked it up and drove it over here an hour ago.  WTF!  Now its dead.  Ed and another guy come over and try taping on the starter, rocking it again... nothing.  So now we have to figure out how to get to the battery.  We manage to get the seat off, and jiggle the battery wires.  One it slightly loose, we tighten it... Nothing.  So Ed finally grabs a battery pack - jumper cable thingy, hooks it up, and she fires right up.  We put it back together, and I'm ready to go.  Ed reminded me his cell # was in the rally pack and to call him if I need any more help.  I told him my first bonus stop was 20 miles away, so if it doesn't start there, then he'd be hearing from me, and I'd be out of the rally.  And off I went... 15 mins behind everyone else.

Now this was 2 years ago, so I don't remember the details of the entire ride.  But my path took me from Baxley, Ga, up into South Carolina, followed the state line north a while, came back into GA, across into the middle of the state, and circled back down and around.  I learned real quick that having the exact GPS coordinates saved A LOT of time.  I was driving around the towns (thankfully most were teeny tiny) looking for the desired landmark.  I probly spent 20 - 30 mins on the first 3 or 4 locations until I found the locations... but I was seeing a pattern.  Nothing was really hidden, and most were on the main drag, near the courthouse.  So common sense started to set in and they got easier to find.  I was also trying to figure out the new-to-me GPS.  I'd type in the next town, it'd say 1 hr, off I'd go, and 35-40 mins later I was there.  I was always gaining time.... and a lot of it.  The GPS in my car... I was lucky to gain one minute running 85mph in 35 zone, let alone 15 - 25 mins like this one.  And I was not speeding.  Most of the time.  But I was able to settle into a rhythm,  I followed my route, and found just about all the bonuses I went for.  I had already planned a conservative route, but the GPS was not allowing me to accurately calculate just how far North-West I could go and still get home in time.   I dropped 3 locations off my original plan just in case.  No point in coming in late and loosing all the points due to late penalties.  Around noon I stopped, got something to eat and drink, and stood up for a while.  Put a call into dad's voice mail to let him know I was fine (and the bike too), and called the wife to say I wasn't dead on the road somewhere.  I was feeling really good still, not tired, not really sore... a little bit, but that was to be expected.  Took some motrin and more tylenol, downed another 5 hour energy and was off again.  I kept on my planned route and the closer to home I got, I was still dropping a lot of time off the clock.  I should not have dropped the northern most locations!  So I added a few more lower point places not far off the lower leg of the trip.  Still I had plenty of time... but no more places to go in range.  So about 9 hours in, I only had 2 more places to go.  But now I was starting to get tired.  I couldn't find the next to last bonus... Screw it,  off to the last one... couldn't find that one either... FK! And I had all the time in the world to look!  Nope.  Not gonna happen.  It was 10 miles from Eds, and the last wild card bonus was "a 6 pack of your favorite beverage"  the politically correct way to say bring some COLD BEER.  I stopped at a CVS, got the beer, and just knew this was going to be the time the battery is dead again and won't start.  I waited to put the beer in the saddle bag, until after it started... just in case I needed it while waiting for a jump start.  But she started right up... just like every other time except the beginning.  I put the resort in the GPS and headed to the farm... almost 2 hours early.

Expecting to be the first one back, I was surprised to be greeted by my dad.  Apparently, about 4 hours into the ride, his GPS showed his next location to be in the middle of the ocean.  None of his other locations would show up right.  So he mapped it home with a dead GPS and waited for the rest of us.  Now I get to learn about the scoring process.  Its pretty cut and dry, and there are NO gimmies.  If it says write some thing down, it better be written down.  If it says get a receipt, you better have the receipt.  If it says bring it to the table for scoring... you cannot get up to go get it if you forgot it in the saddle bag.  Once you are in the chair in front of the Rally Bastard... you are there till the end.  I lost a good amount of points for forgetting stuff on my score sheet.  The worst was not writing down the points for the gas receipts to 2 states.  I had the receipts at the scoring table... but since I didn't write it down...XXXX. NO points.  And after driving that far out of the way to get it.  But this is how you learn.  I was tired, but still thinking this was a lot of fun.  The most fun I'd had in a while.  We watched the rest of the riders trickle in, most within the last 20 mins of the 12 hr window.  One guy cut it close so he was flying down the dirt road, hit the grass drive way to the area, and dumped the bike.  He was fine, the bike was fine as far as we could tell, and was listed as a few mins early.  One was about 5 mins late after driving the last 200 miles home around 90mph.  He got a ticket 15 mins from the end.  Late penalty, lost the no-ticket bonus, and has to pay the ticket.  Ouch!  But everyone made it back... no accidents, 1 ticket, no mechanical failures.... oh wait.  Dad decided to load the bikes up on the trailer before it got too late and too much beer was downed.  He hit the starter on the Vic, it cranked right up.... but the starter didn't turn off. He immediately drove it to the trailer, starter whirling away, and turned it off.  Starter motor still running.  He pulled the seat, and disconnected the battery... finally the stater motor turned off.  Ok, one mechanical failure.  I'm soooo glad it didn't do that while I was 200 miles from home!  But all in all it was a good day.  Ate some dinner, they added up the points for everyone, and I met my goal.  I did not finish last!  I actually ended up in 6th place!  Not too bad for my first attempt.  On a borrowed bike.  With no real GPS.   I was happy.  I was hooked.

Iron Butts and Rallys

Fast Forward a few years, and changing family dynamics.... my dad bought a new motorcycle.  His girlfriend didn't mind too much.  It was Vulcan 750 cruiser.  Neat little bike.  Fun to ride, looked like a Harley... w/o all the problems :)  He was back on a bike after a long time off of them.  Awesome.  Fast Fwd a couple more years... that lil 750 wasn't enough, and the newest girlfriend wanted to drive one, instead of ride on the back.  Along comes a Victory 1300cc... The Beast as I call it.  It is still the largest bike that I have ever ridden.  Windshield, saddle bags, shaft drive... Really Awesome.  This bike was made to ride.  And with bags, you could ride all day and carry stuff with you. So what do you do with a bike that is comfy, and you can carry stuff on it???

IRON BUTT Rides.  WTF is that?  Somehow my dad heard about the Iron Butt Association, and their sanctioned rides.  He decided this was something he wanted to try.  The "entry level" ride you can do, and get a certification is a Saddle Sore 1000.  SS1000 is a 1000 mile ride to anywhere, completed in 24 hrs or less.  He did one... and another.. then a 1500 miler... then a Lap Of Florida... 1850 miles in 32 hours or less,  touching Perdido Key (Pensacola), Amelia Island, Key West, Naples, and back to Perdido Key... he was the 4th person ever to do it.  Needless to say he's hooked on Long Distance rides.  I'd hear the stories of the rides and the issues that pop up, the paperwork nightmare they are to get them certified.... and wonder why would anyone do this.  Whats the fun in it?  There has to be a reason to do this!  Well there is.  The Iron Butt Association hosts, every 2 years, the Iron Butt Rally.  It takes place over 11 days, and is around 11,000 miles.  And to qualify for the IBR, you have to have completed a select few of the IBA rides, and/or competed in other multi-day rallies and placed well.  A typical rally, unlike the IBR, is 10 - 36 hrs.  Some start and end at the same place like Eds Last Resort Rally, and some start in multiple locations and end at the same place like the Cape Fear 1000.  How a Rally works is its pretty much like a scavenger hunt, but on a motorcycle.  The rally master hands out a list of places you can go see, called bonus locations.  Each location is given a different point value, generally based on how far away it is or how hard it is to get to.  Most bonuses are something like... "In Smalltown, Nowhere, on the corner of 1st and Main is the Courthouse.  In what year was the building built. " And generally the GPS coordinates are also given.  Your goal is to plan a route to drive to the most bonus locations, collect the required info, and get back to the end location before the time is up.  He who collects the most points wins.  Easy right.  Wrong!  They also throw in "Wildcard" bonuses like: get gas in 3 states, get a Vidalia onion in Vidalia, GA, eat a hotdog at three different hotdog stands in 3 different towns... stuff like that.  Those bonii make you have to think, and strategize a bit more than just drive 2000 miles to 50 places.  The fastest rider doesn't usually win.

There is a large size cult of motorcyclists that partake in these rallys.  Some just stop at the IBA rides.  And some get creative with the rides.  I talked to one guy that did a SS1000, 1000 miles in 24 hrs, all within the city limits of NY city.  One of the rides is 10 SS1000's in 10 days.  Enough people did that, so one guy got a bit more creative.  He did 10, 1000 miles rides in 10 days, each day on a different motorcycle (Richard Buber).  But the most extreme ride I know of, and met the rider (same that did the NY Ride) is a trip from Prudhoe Bay Alaska, to Key West.  To get the certification, you have 30 days (720 hrs) to complete it.  John Ryan did it in 84 hours (3.5 days).  Why?  Because someone else did it in 92 hrs and thought he could do better...  What did he get for it?  Nothing.  These rally guys are from all walks of life, electricians, lawyers, mechanics, computer geeks... but they all share an un-natural love to ride motorcycles.  For any reason... or no reason at all.  They just want to ride.

FWD a bit...  Once dad completed a few of these rides, he decided it was time to try his hand in a rally.  Then another.  Then decided the Vic was not a good rally bike.  1.  Its HUGE.  2. The gas tank is too small so it take a lot of gas stops.  3. Its V-Twin vibrates A LOT.   This means he needs something smaller, bigger gas tank, and a smoother ride.  So he bought a Kawasaki Concours, 1000cc, the largest tank on a bike, and somewhat smoother ride.  He slaps on a GPS and is ready to rally for real.  While at these rallies, he meets Ed Tillman, who hosts his own rally every year or so.  Dad asked for the web address so he could look it up, but he didn't have one.  Technology is NOT one of Ed's strong suits.  Lucky for him, my dad's son knows how to build and host websites... And does it pretty cheap!  So he contacted me about doing the web site and email stuff for Eds Last Resort Rally.  I took on the duties, long before I understood the rally stuff and Iron Butt stuff.  I needed diaper money, and I liked motorcycles, so why not.  I found a photo of a really cool chopper online and doctored it up,  made it look really sweet... showed it to Ed, and he laughed. 

"Well son... You don't quite understand what a "Rally" bike is.  Take a look at your dad's bike, and you'll know what I mean."  So then I Googled around for pictures of rally bikes, and started getting my feet wet in this crazy sub-culture.  And I asked dad to send my a picture of his bike to add to the website.


Bike Differences:

Basically,  choppers ( like most bikes at bike week I saw)  are low, loud, and really cool to look at. They have a speedometer, and maybe a tach.  But they SUCK to ride more than an hour or so because they are uncomfortable, and are probably needing gas already.  The rider has on cowboy boots, bandannas, black everything, and maybe a skull cap helmet.  They may have a map stashed somewhere.  Who cares where you are.  They can get directions from the next bartender. (I may be over exaggerating a bit just to make a point... I still want a chopper one day).

A rally bike is a taller bike, wrap around fairings, big gas tanks, windshields, and TONS of electronic gizmos.  1 to 3 GPS units, satellite trackers, satellite radio for weather and traffic.  Spare gas tanks, extra saddle bags, hydration systems. The riders (generally) have full body protective suits that are everything proof... rain, hail, snow...  Can have heated gloves, seats, grips, vests, pants.... for cold weather rides.  Helmets generally have Bluetooth earphones to listen to all the gizmos.  Some even have iPads and netbooks installed in water proof cases.  Knowing where you are and where you are going is king. (I may be understating a bit).

Ed liked the new rally bike picture, and was happy.  Then he invited me to the next rally to experience the rally culture.  Hey why not.  I told dad I'd probably go with him to see how it all operates and get some good photos for the website.  Then the light bulb came on.  Since dad still had the Victory... He offered it to me to actually participate in the rally. Sure!  Why not.  I haven't ridden a bike in 6 years, and my ass was numb after 6 hours on it (dads Vulcan 750).  Whats 12hrs on a Victory?   So I went.